How many times have you heard the word â€œnoâ€:
- No, you donâ€™t qualify for that loan
- No, you didnâ€™t get that promotion
- No, I donâ€™t have time to meet with you
Even worse, how many times have you told yourself â€œnoâ€:
- No, I donâ€™t have enough experience so I wonâ€™t even bother to try
- No, Iâ€™m not smart enough to get that position
- No, Iâ€™m just not good enough
Those are the most damaging of all â€“ the â€œnoâ€™sâ€ we tell ourselves. They can limit our possibilities and squash our dreams. So how can we overcome them? How can we control them?
Well, hereâ€™s one trick that helps me:
Every time I tell myself â€œno,â€ I stop and replace that statement with something positive. For instance, if I tell myself â€œNo, Iâ€™m not qualified for that job,â€ I will stop and turn that statement into something like â€œI know I am qualified and will do all I can to prepare for that position.â€ Then Iâ€™ll make a list of all the qualities I possess that will make me a success.
One of the most challenging times for me was when I first started my speaking business. I canâ€™t begin to tell you how many people told me I was â€œtoo oldâ€ to start my own business. Many people, even some dear friends, told me that no one pays for speakers anymore and that I would fail. It was really hard to push through, but I overcame these â€œnoâ€™sâ€ by replacing them with statements like:
I believe I have a powerful message that will help others who are facing challenges in their life. I believe in myself and I am NOT going to give up.
Replacing â€œnoâ€™sâ€ with a positive statement will not eliminate them completely, but I guarantee that it will quiet them. Every time you see one coming your way, stop, face it, and say something good to replace it. With time, you will have all those negative thoughts, and all those “no’s,” under control.